Three women’s souls hung in the balance, but viewers were the ones being tormented.
The afterlife plot gets sillier every week, and on Days of Our Lives during the week of 2-13-23 it jumped the shark — again.
Bizarre plots have always been part of this soap, but can we agree that this one has gone way too far?
Trying to make sense of the antics up in Heaven gives me a headache.
It was cute when Bo watched his loved ones on a magic TV during Beyond Salem 2. But now Nick has a remote to turn off Kate’s psychic connection with Roman and the Devil looks like Doug even though Doug is still alive. Can someone please make this nonsense stop?
The best part of this ridiculous story was Kayla’s “accidental” visit to Steve where she told him what had been going on. Steve’s bemused reactions cracked me up. They also demonstrated how ridiculous this story is.
This story is beyond goofy. It makes no sense whatsoever and doesn’t seem to have a purpose beyond pure campiness.
Theoretically, the stakes shouldn’t get any higher than fearing the Devil will take three women’s souls. But is anyone seriously worried about the women?
There’s no tension or pressure here; we know that Marlena, Kate, and Kayla will be fine and that they likely will be back on Earth with their husbands when this story ends.
The only thing viewers are stressed about is how long they’re going to have to endure this nonsense!
This was one of those stories that could have been amazing if it had been written seriously. The three women navigating the afterlife while the Devil, in the form of Nick, tries to turn them against each other and make them hate their Earthly partners sounds like a great premise.
But instead, it’s so silly it doesn’t even work as a parody of Heaven stories.
Days of Our Lives has always had one foot firmly in the fantastical. The Melaswen story, the crazy experiments Dr. Rolf does, and the wacky Garden of Eden story make this silliness feel like par for the course. Still, most of the time those stories have a point to them even if they are ridiculous.
This one seems to be nonsense for its own sake.
At least the women’s funerals were off-screen. I don’t think I would have been able to take the endless mourning of three women that we know aren’t going to stay dead long-term.
Marlena: Doug’s not…
Devil: He’s fine. He’ll probably outlive us all. I thought a familiar face would help you be comfortable. Besides, if you saw my true form your face would melt off.
Bill Hayes seemed to be enjoying his stint as the Devil, but a better option was available: Marlena’s sister, Samantha.
Marlena’s sister played a similar role back in the 1970s as Hattie does today, impersonating Marlena and having the real Marlena committed.
She had a drug problem and a theft problem, and although she had supposedly reformed by the time of her 1982 death, it’s not outside the realm of possibility that she would end up serving the Prince of Darkness.
Although Samantha was originally played by Deidre Hall’s real-life twin sister, there’s no reason that Hall couldn’t have done double-duty, and it would have been fun for Marlena to be arguing with her mirror image.
It would have been a great nod to history, too, as Samantha’s death was written in to appease a ton of anguished Marlena fans who couldn’t accept the idea of Marlena being murdered by the Salem Strangler.
Instead, Marlena argued with a Doug doppelganger, using all her skills as a therapist to convince him that he didn’t really want to get the women’s souls via cheating.
Marlena: How do I know I can trust you to keep your end of the bargain? You are the Devil, after all.
Devil: Believe it or not, my word means something around here.
Deals with the Devil are supposed to be binding, but not on Days of Our Lives. All Kate and Kayla had to do was refuse to accept Marlena’s sacrifice and the deal was undone. Seriously? What was the point of that?
Is ANYONE looking forward to the women’s adventures in the “bad place?”
And what happened to Angela, the annoying angel that butted heads with Bo when he was in Heaven?
Even she’s preferable to anymore of Nick gloating.
This was a man whom Kate helped throw in the river after he tried to rape Gabi, only for him to return from the dead to torment Gabi some more. She killed him to stop the abuse, and it would have been nice for that to be the last time he appeared on DAYS.
Meanwhile, the men’s plot to kill Orpheus back on Earth took a similarly unrealistic turn.
Statesville has never resembled a real prison, but this week’s events took the cake!
Orpheus’ unlimited supply of good booze was probably the most true-to-life part of this silly story.
Inmates DO sneak alcohol and drugs into prisons. And there are corrupt COs who will look the other way when prisoners they like do things they’re not supposed to, so I’ll give the writers a pass on that useless guard not punishing Orpheus for it.
However, prison life is extremely structured; inmates don’t get to wander around aimlessly and spend their time however they wish. And there’s no such thing as an inmate deciding he’s not going to go to his job at the infirmary today; such behavior is generally met with harsh consequences.
DAYS ignores this routinely, and guards being MIA while prisoners plot escapes and revenge schemes is typical for this show. But the entire infirmary sequence was so improbable it was distracting!
And don’t get me started on the prison doctor who told Lucas to just stop drinking or who left Schedule II drugs in an unlocked cabinet so that Steve could access them.
Orpheus: What about your eternal soul? Killing breaks a commandment.
Steve: Somehow, I think the Big Dude will understand.
Orpheus: I know I’m going to Hell. Do you really want to join me there?
Orpheus got some great lines in while Steve and John wasted time threatening him. He wasn’t afraid of those two at all; if anything, the pressure he was under allowed him to display an even quicker wit than usual.
Does he really know anything about what happened to the lifesaving orchid? Orpheus isn’t above making up a name to get himself out of trouble!
But assuming he’s telling the truth for once, who could it be?
Who Will Orpheus Name As His Accomplice?
Megan Hathaway makes the most sense, since she’s returning to DAYS soon, and she may need that orchid to finish resurrecting Bo.
But Orpheus could name someone random or say something to upset his enemies, such as claiming that Sami or another of their loved ones is responsible for the women’s deaths.
While the guys were squaring off with Orpheus, everyone else in Salem dealt with run-of-the-mill heartbreaks and blackmailing schemes.
Jennifer tried to turn herself in rather than give in to Jack’s blackmail, but Jack wasn’t having it. Understandably, he didn’t want to risk Jennifer going to prison. But this still cut off a promising story.
The Spectator is not only Jack’s legacy, but it’s where he and Jennifer first met. And Jack and Jennifer trying to outwit Gwen and Xander to hold onto their paper and Jennifer’s freedom would have been a compelling story!
Instead, their resistance to blackmail lasted half an hour. They gave in and now Gwen and Xander are planning to turn it into a tabloid that cares more about sensationalism than accuracy.
Ugh. Can we not, please?
Jack had options. He could have consulted Justin or Belle before Gwen and Xander made their second demand so that he could protect Jennifer without giving up his paper. He also could have told Gwen that if she pressed charges, he’d press charges against her for ALL of her crimes that he’d forgiven in the past.
He needs to get on the phone to JJ STAT! JJ was able to neutralize Theresa’s blackmail back in the day and could help his parents get rid of Gwen now.
Also, what was the point of Sonny learning about this scheme, only to turn around and leave Salem with Will? I get that Will and Sonny were being written out, but it seemed pointless for Sonny to be part of this Spectator-napping story if he’s going to leave before doing anything about it.
Sonny and Allie’s exits had been leaked ahead of time, so this wasn’t surprising, but both characters’ decisions to leave felt rushed.
They were both in the middle of stories. Allie lost Chanel after cheating on her with Alex and Sonny had learned five minutes earlier about Leo conspiring to steal Jack’s paper from him. Then they both decided to leave town.
Allie’s decision was more understandable; she felt it was over between her and Chanel and wanted to put as much distance between them as possible. Still, she went from sobbing that Chanel was the love of her life to deciding to start over in New Zealand without much space in between.
Allie: This can’t be it. You know how much you mean to me. You know how much us being together means to me. Being with you, it is like nothing I have ever felt before. And it’s nothing I ever thought I could feel for a woman, let alone my best friend, okay? And when you kissed me for the first time, it opened up a part of me I didn’t even know I had. And I know it took me a long time to come to terms with it, but once I came out to my friends and family and to myself and I was able to finally be with you, I realized how special it was and how lucky I was, and… we have been through so much together. We have shared so much. You have opened up an entire new part of me. And I love you so much. We love each other so much. So it can’t be over between us.
Chanel: I’m sorry, but it is. And yes, everything you said is true. We did share everything and we did love each other. But now we’re just hurting each other. And the last thing I ever want to do is hurt you. So I think it’s best if we end things now before we hurt each other anymore.
The end of her relationship with Chanel also felt like it was wrapped up super fast, though I’m not complaining about that. We’d already had more than enough of these two tearing each other to pieces.
Chanel made a mature decision by deciding to end it now before they hurt each other more. I don’t know what universe Allie lives in that she thinks Chanel could forget about her sleeping with Alex and having him hide under a table so Chanel wouldn’t find out!
The good news is that with Allie leaving town, Paulina can’t convince Chanel to try again.
Paulina’s attitude toward this never made sense — and by the way, no one told her to bother Johnny, either. If she doesn’t want him to fall hard for Chanel, she might not want to forbid him seeing her — that’s a recipe for a forbidden romance!
And now that Chanel is single, how long will Johnny and Wendy’s romance last, especially since Tripp wants Wendy too and Wendy seems more into him than Johnny?
Nicole, EJ, Eric, and Sloan had the worst Valentine’s Day ever, mostly because neither Nicole nor Eric could keep their attention on the person they were with. How obnoxious!
EJ had the sense to ask for another table, but when none were available, he didn’t realize that he could sit facing Eric so that Nicole wouldn’t see what was going on over there. It might not have worked, but it was worth a try.
Nicole and Eric’s walking out at the same time was inevitable, but the reason was contrived, at least on Eric’s part. He’s never worn reading glasses before, and if he needed them to read the dessert menu, how did he order dinner?
If I were Sloan or EJ, I wouldn’t want another date after this disaster. But soap characters think differently; they both ended up having sex with their partner after escaping the restaurant.
Finally, the Chloe/Stefan/Gabi/Li mess took some weird turns.
Among the most awkward: Chloe being MIA so that Nicole had to relay messages to Brady and Stefan about her feelings. Also, I don’t know who besides Brady needs to hear this, but calling Chloe multiple times to tell her you respect her need for space is not respecting that need at all!
Stefan’s slip of the tongue was annoying but expected, considering he’s been brainwashed and then half deprogrammed and doesn’t quite know whether he’s coming or going. Gabi’s reaction was also unsurprising.
But giving Li the time of day? Really? Gabi is a better schemer than that! Unless she had some plan to get Li into trouble, there was no reason for her to visit his hotel room.
Your turn, Days of Our Lives fanatics. Hit the big, blue SHOW COMMENTS button and let us know your thoughts.
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Jack Ori is a senior staff writer for TV Fanatic. His debut young adult novel, Reinventing Hannah, is available on Amazon. Follow him on Twitter.